Narcissistic abuse isn’t always as easy to spot as physical abuse. However, it can sting just as badly and leave lasting emotional and mental scars.
When you’re in a relationship with someone that has a narcissistic personality, they’re likely not thinking about your feelings or how their words or actions might affect you. Rather, their focus is on themselves and getting what they want.
That’s often a hard reality to accept, but once you realize it, it might be easier to remove yourself from that toxic relationship, knowing it’s never going to get better unless your partner is willing to make a drastic change.
It’s also important to realize some of the common signs of narcissistic abuse. Again, they might not be as clear-cut as physical signs, but once you know what to look for, they’ll become clearer.
With that, let’s take a look at four signs of narcissistic abuse in relationships.
1. Gaslighting
Gaslighting has become somewhat of a “buzzword” in recent years. That’s good in that it’s bringing awareness, but it can also often be misused because of its popularity.
True gaslighting can be extremely damaging, and it’s often a telltale sign of narcissistic abuse. Examples of gaslighting include your partner making you feel like you’re always in the wrong, or you’re always apologizing for things.
You might also be experiencing gaslighting if you feel like everything is your fault, your self-esteem is suffering, and you make excuses for your partner’s negative and/or abusive behavior.
2. Isolation
Does your partner get upset when you want to spend time with family or friends? Do they make excuses to try to keep you away from those people? Maybe they make negative comments about the people you care about to try to change your opinion of them.
Narcissists don’t often want their partners to spend time with other people, because it puts them at risk of losing control over you. They might worry that family members or friends would try to get you to realize you’re being abused, and that can be a big fear for someone who thrives on control in the relationship.
3. Constant Criticism
Narcissistic abuse is often a form of verbal abuse. It’s not “normal” for your partner to constantly put you down or insult nearly everything about you. A partner doesn’t necessarily have to like everything you do. But, there’s a big difference when it comes to insulting you at every corner.
Those insults can quickly cause you to think less of yourself. Unfortunately, the lower your self-esteem gets, the easier it is for the narcissist in your life to gain more control and make you feel like you aren’t worth anything without them.
4. Love Bombing
The idea of “love bombing” might seem contradictory to the other signs on this list. But, don’t be fooled — your partner isn’t showering you with affection because they truly care. Rather, it’s common for narcissists to demonstrate affection as a form of manipulation.
When your partner is extremely affectionate and attentive, it can be confusing, since they can be so cutting other times. But they can often string you along just enough to stay with them and continue making excuses for their bad behavior.
There are so many other signs associated with narcissistic abuse. Hopefully, though, these red flags have gotten your attention. If you’ve noticed any (or all) of them in your relationship, you’re dealing with a narcissist.
Unfortunately, narcissistic abusers rarely change on their own. You have to ask yourself whether it’s healthy and safe to stay in the relationship. No one deserves that kind of abuse, and if your partner isn’t going to stop it, it’s time to walk away and take care of yourself. If you would like additional support or are seeking professional help with the relationship, Contact Us for more information.