You’ve probably heard of couples counseling, even before you were in a relationship. If you’re reading this, you might have even considered it before. But, maybe you’ve talked yourself out of it more than once because of common myths and misconceptions.
Couples counseling can be beneficial for just about anyone in a relationship, no matter the stage. Understanding some of the common myths about coupes counseling that might be holding you back can help you develop a clearer picture of what to expect. So, you can determine if it’s the right step for you and your partner.
Let’s take a look at some of those common myths and what you’re really likely to get out of the experience.
It’s Only for Couples in Trouble
You don’t have to wait until your relationship is in crisis mode to benefit from couples counseling. It’s a common myth to assume that only couples who are struggling should seek help.
You can look at couples counseling as a maintenance process. It’s something to be used proactively, not reactively. By working with a counselor, you’ll strengthen the bond in your relationship, improve communication, build intimacy, and more. Even if you’re currently content and happy in your relationship, there’s always room to improve.
It’s a Quick Fix
If you do seek out couples counseling because your relationship is in trouble, don’t assume that it will fix things right away.
While counseling can help you see things from your partner’s perspective, learn to communicate more effectively, and more, it should never be considered a “quick fix” to the problems you’re having. Rather, it will teach you the skills needed to make a lasting commitment of change and growth that you can take with you long after your sessions are over.
The Therapist Will Take Sides
One of the biggest misconceptions brought up in counseling is that the therapist or counselor will agree with one partner over another.
That isn’t their job.
It’s essential for a counselor to remain neutral and to listen to both sides of any story or argument. While they might point out positive behaviors or suggestions, they aren’t going to “choose” one partner to agree with more, or definitively say that one person is right and the other is wrong.
Only One Partner Needs to Want It to Work
For couples counseling to truly be a success, both partners need to be completely committed to the process. Engagement is necessary. Couples counseling is much more than just talking about feelings. It involves learning actionable steps you can take to strengthen and improve your relationship.
If one partner feels like they’re just being “dragged” there or they aren’t willing to put in the work, it’s unlikely the other partner will be able to salvage things.
A Stranger Can’t Help
It’s understandable to think that someone who isn’t directly involved in the day-to-day happenings of your relationship couldn’t provide any help. But, a good counselor knows how to focus on the strengths of each person, identify potential issues in the relationship, and serve as a neutral party to help people work things out in healthy, productive ways.
A good counselor should also be someone you feel comfortable with. Couples counseling requires some opening up, so your counselor should create an inviting and comforting setting to ease that process.
Unfortunately, there are many additional myths about couples counseling. If you’re still on the fence about whether it’s right for you, I’m happy to squash those misconceptions and help you decide if it should be the next step in your relationship. Contact us for more information or to set up a consultation.