Relationship uncertainty can cause you to feel uneasy and anxious. It might lead you to believe that there’s something wrong within your relationship — or even something wrong with you. But, this kind of uncertainty doesn’t necessarily mean you and your partner are on rocky ground.
There are many factors that can play into relationship uncertainty. Some of the common causes include previous negative experiences or trauma, poor communication, trust issues, or even personal self-esteem issues.
Whatever the case, knowing how to cope with this kind of uncertainty can make a big difference in how you feel about yourself, your partner, and your relationship.
Signs of Relationship Uncertainty
Uncertainty in a relationship can show up in a variety of ways. You might constantly worry about how your partner feels about you, or doubt that they really care. You might even feel anxious around your partner, like you’re walking on eggshells whenever they’re around.
Relationship uncertainty can also cause you to question whether you’re really happy in your relationship. You might start to look elsewhere to find that happiness or fulfillment, leading you to seek attraction in other people. That doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll cheat on your partner. But, everyone wants to feel seen, heard, and understood. If you’re dealing with instability in your relationship, you might try to find those things elsewhere.
What Can You Do?
If you’re dealing with uncertainty in your relationship, the best thing you can do is to prioritize healthy communication. It’s the cornerstone of every strong relationship.
When you aren’t effectively communicating with your partner, it leaves room for uncertainty and anxiety to creep in.
To start practicing better communication, express your true feelings and encourage your partner to do the same. In addition to speaking about yourself and your needs, make sure you practice active listening. Try to really hear what your partner is saying and put yourself in their shoes as often as possible.
When you choose to communicate in healthy ways, you start closing the door on uncertainty, and you’ll find that you can become closer, as a couple.
Focusing On Yourself
Your relationship uncertainty might stem from your own insecurities. Do you have trust issues from past relationships? Do you lack confidence or self-worth because of things that have happened in your past?
Those things are understandable, but they should also be addressed. If your self-confidence is holding you back from feeling secure in your relationship, getting to the root of those issues and practicing self-care should be a top priority.
Your partner can’t “fix” those issues for you, and they shouldn’t have to. Focus on prioritizing your well-being so you can bring your best self to your relationship and every other area of life.
If you find that you’re worried about your relationship more often than not, stop focusing on the “what ifs” of the future. Instead, practice mindfulness. Stay present in the moment and keep your attention on what’s happening now, rather than what might happen later.
Create Goals Together
When you’re communicating more effectively with your partner, you can determine what you want your future to look like together. Relationship uncertainty caused by the unknown can be resolved by making plans you’re both looking forward to.
Talk about your shared goals and visions. Even if they aren’t exactly the same right now, discussing them can help you reach healthy compromises or possibly change your perspective on what you really want.
Don’t assume that uncertainty in your relationship needs to spell disaster for you and your partner. By working on your own insecurities, practicing healthy communication, and looking to a bright future together, you can calm that anxiety and feel more confident in your relationship.
Contact Us
Are you and your partner have tried working on the uncertainties and aren’t seeing any movement? Would you like additional support navigating through the challenges you’re currentlyy experiencing? We invite you to Contact Us to learn more more about Couples Counseling or to get started working with one of our skilled therapists.