What to Do If Your Sex Life Feels Monotonous

Unmade bedThere are plenty of stereotypes, jokes, and “horror stories” out there about how easy it is for your sex life to lose its luster. People like to joke about the spark being gone, or the bedroom getting boring.

So, you might think that the monotony in your own sex life is normal.

But, that isn’t necessarily true. If that monotony has impacted your relationship, or it just leaves you craving more intimacy from your partner, there are things you can do to improve it.

Keep in mind that it’s normal to experience these “seasons” of sexual monotony at times when you’re with the same person. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, your partner, or your relationship.

However, if you want to get your sex life back on track, it takes a bit of effort. Let’s cover some strategies you can use right away to put some of the spark back into your intimate relationship.

Be Open With Your Partner

When was the last time you talked to your partner about your sex life?

Often, it feels easier said than done to open up about your experiences in the bedroom, even though you’re both directly involved. It takes trust, vulnerability, and a willingness to express your needs and wants to talk about your sex life.

Keeping those things to yourself, however, can damage your physical relationship. Your partner can’t work on anything in the bedroom if they don’t recognize there’s a problem, or if they don’t know they aren’t fulfilling your needs.

Talk about any sexual concerns you might have. Open up about the things you like and don’t like, and even things you’re interested in trying.

You might be surprised by how open your partner will be, in return. When you both show more vulnerability, it’s easier to feel closer and more in sync with your physical connection.

Connect With Your Body

Even if you actively communicate with your partner, are you listening to yourself? How open are you to trying new things?

Sometimes, we get so caught up in familiarity—even with sex—that trying something different seems a little scary. But, if your sex life feels monotonous, switching things up and trying something new could be exactly what you need.

Instead of listening to your head, listen to your body. Consider what really feels good and what doesn’t, and explore that further with your partner. You might end up trying something completely new that ends up reigniting the flame between the two of you.

Like communicating about sex, trying new things requires vulnerability and trust.

Make sure you and your partner are on the same page about your actions and willingness to do certain things. The more in-tune you are with one another, the easier it will be to try new things without hesitation.

Don’t Be Afraid to Seek Help

If you’re having trouble opening up to your partner, you’re certainly not alone.

For many people, sex is a difficult subject to talk about, even with someone you love. Maybe you’re comfortable talking about it, but your partner isn’t. In either case, seeking professional help might be the best way to spice up your sex life. Feel free to Contact Us to get started with a free consultation or visit our Sex Therapy page to learn more.

We can help provide a space for both of you to open up in a safe and comfortable setting. You might learn more about your own needs and desires than you ever expected, as well as the wants of your partner.

Most importantly, working with a one of us can give you the skills needed to continue the conversation at home. Eventually, you can become more comfortable talking with your partner about sex and having more open communication surrounding your most intimate moments.

A monotonous sex life doesn’t have to cause issues in your relationship. Keep these suggestions in mind, and you’ll see just how quickly things can start to feel new again.